I GAVE BIRTH AT HOME…PART 1

My name is Katarina and I would love to share my birth story with you aka How you can give natural birth even after IVF treatment (the process of fertilization by manually combining an egg and sperm).

I need to start at the beginning so bare with me please 🙂
I used to be the typical woman wanting an expensive buggy, beautiful room for my baby with all the unnecessary but pretty things and terrified of giving birth. However life/destiny/god? had other plans for me. After getting rid of the birth control pill and not menstruating for couple of months I realized there was something wrong with me and long story short, my doctor told me that if I want to ever have a baby, we will need to use IVF. I won’t bore you with details, it was a long 4 years during which we tried 4 times, I was pregnant with twins and lost them at 8 weeks, exercised, lost weight, became pregnant again…. During this time I kept reading a lot..books, internet, forums…and my view of birth giving underwent a huge change. I started to see how important this single act was for the future of my baby, his health, his concept of life….and also for me, my health and also for our relationship. I learned how hormones work, how our bodies work…I lost almost all fear and what has remained was respect and trust.
So when I became pregnant again, I knew exactly how I wanted to give birth. First of all naturally, secondly at home with only my husband and midwife. The beginning of my pregnancy was tough. I was pregnant with twins again but was loosing one of the babies. I was bleeding and scared to loose them both again. I was taking medication first 12 weeks. After the bleeding stopped however, my pregnancy became normal and the rest was as healthy as can be. At 20 weeks I started believing I can really do it the way I imagined and my midwife also agreed. I did not take any other medication till the end, I exercised yoga, I had normal blood results, my son was growing healthy and strong in my belly.
When the day finally came I was at 40 weeks 5 days. I could not sleep that night, only about 4 hours and woke up to a slight pain in the morning (about 7am). My husband was asleep next to me. I had a feeling that my water might break (can’t explain it) but when I went to the toilet nothing happened. I sat there a while disappointed and told my son that I was looking forward to giving birth today and suddenly when I stood up, a trickle went down my leg…I had just peed so it must have been my water, I thought. I washed myself in the bath where something bloody came out (my plug) and when I went to my knees to dry off the mess I made on the floor, another trickle came out 😀 that was when I realized I needed to put something between my legs or I will be cleaning after myself the whole day 🙂 I also realized that this was finally it. I was soooo happy.
When I returned to bed my hubby was awake. I told him my water broke and he immediately started panicking. Asked me how I can be so calm and what are we going to do. I told him I was going to go back to bed and rest some more since we have plenty of time. He calmed down a bit when he saw how calm I am. Then got up and went to scrub the bath clean since I was planning to spend a lot of time there. I sent a text to my midwife to not make plans for the day since it was starting but not to come yet. Then I got up and went to make some soup. The morning went slowly, the waves I was feeling were not too strong and I could do almost anything I wanted. I was calm and happy. At about midday I asked my husband to watch a comedy with me since I read somewhere that laughter helps speed things up. So we watched, I bounced on my ball leaning on a chair in front of me and halfway through the movie I realized I wasn’t watching anymore but had to concentrate on breathing down and relaxing during the waves which were not so pleasant anymore but also not very painful either. It was time to get in my big tub and let nice hot water help me to relax.
At about 2pm I could’t help vocalizing during waves and let out a deep “aaaaaa” with every single one. In between I was sleeping for the 3-4 minutes I had. I needed to save energy. My midwife came around 3pm and examined how far along I was. 4cm…not bad. Most of the time till the 2nd stage I spent alone in my bath..that is how I wanted it. Everything and everybody disturbed me, so my husband and midwife talked in the living room while I sang my “aaaa” every couple of minutes. At around 7:30pm I was fully dilated and midwife told me that I can push if I feel like it. There were however still 2 hours of labor in front of me. Contractions weakened so I had to push actively during them, no breathing and letting my body do it…I had to focus. I pushed on the toilet, in the bath, in bed on my side with one leg up but finally the best position was on all fours on the floor next to our bed. My upper body on the bed, knees on a soft mat. This is how I finally got him out with the last bit of energy remaining. It did hurt, I was sure I would
tear but I wanted him out and didn’t care anymore. One contraction, big push and his head was out. Bit of waiting for another contraction and the rest of him came. Midwife only helped him down to the mat and I immediately sat down and took him to my arms. He appeared so big (3,77kg) and cried a lot. I think he also didn’t like the long pushing. My big beautiful healthy boy was here. It was 9:32pm 23.12.2015. My husband cried.
They both helped me to bed with my baby in my arms and midwife left us alone with him so we can enjoy the moment. Placenta was still in me, the cord untouched pulsating between us. Daddy laying next to us. Couple more contractions as my son tried to climb to my breast but I didn’t care anymore. I was in love. When midwife came back the cord was already white so she clamped and cut it. Daddy took off his shirt and put our son on his chest. I went to push out the placenta on the toilet. It was easier than to push in bed. While midwife examined it I took a shower and felt soooo great. Full of energy and happy. When I washed the blood and meconium (the dark green substance forming the first faeces of a newborn) off me I could go and run a mile how great I felt. I went back to bed to my baby though. Then midwife examined me and I was amazed to learn that I had no cuts or bruises down there. So great, it was a big relief for me. After examining out baby the midwife went home and we could spread the good news to family.
I couldn’t sleep till morning, I was amazed. To give birth at home was the best choice of my life. 🙂

I WANTED NATURAL DELIVERY SO I WROTE MY BIRTH PLAN.

When I was younger I never thought about the delivery. I never thought one day I’ll be mother. And if I thought then I was pretty sure I’ll either adopt the baby or go for C-section. Vaginal delivery was equal to tremendous pain and I was just not interested in that. What is that thing in women’s life that turns her into ‘I-don’t-care-creature’? Is it the media presenting child birth as bloody painful event that we just have to survive? Is it our mothers and whole society talking about their experiences as something that had to be done? Is it our husbands who feel disgusting once we start talking about delivery?

It became a mind set for all the women. But then, when you are really pregnant, you start to think and you deserve to know all the information available. During my pregnancy I was strong enough to change my mind set. I studied ayurvedic approach to pregnancy, yoga, meditations, hypno-birthing, natural ways how to carry on with pregnancy till home delivery.

Finally I did’t give birth at home as I was planning and dreaming. Not because of any complications but it was just too much complicated. Me living in India, traveling to Slovakia, staying in house with my parents…So we decided to travel to Austria to one of those places where you can give natural birth…And here our family history started peacefully and naturally 🙂

I would love to share my Birth Plan which I wrote not only for the doctors/midwives but also for my husband to understand all what I need and to protect me and our baby in case of any disrespectful manners from hospital staff. It’s written in simple language so men can remember 🙂

Write me to my email lucia@oneanothermother.com to get your copy in pdf.